Course outline
Module 1
Module 1: Foundations of Connection
Foundations of Connection
Knowledge check
Q1. Which of the following is considered a foundational element of close relationships according to research on human connection?
- A. Frequent material gifts
- B. Feeling understood and accepted by the other person ✓
- C. Living in the same neighborhood
- D. Sharing the same hobbies at all times
Why: Research on close relationships consistently highlights mutual understanding and acceptance as core foundations. When people feel seen and valued for who they are, trust and closeness tend to grow.
Q2. What is the term for the feeling of being valued and cared for by others?
- A. Social comparison
- B. Belonging ✓
- C. Conformity
- D. Independence
Why: Belonging refers to the basic human need to feel accepted and connected within a group or relationship. Psychologists such as Roy Baumeister and Mark Leary have described this need as fundamental to well-being.
Q3. Which behavior best supports the building of trust in a new friendship?
- A. Sharing only positive news
- B. Keeping your promises consistently ✓
- C. Avoiding all disagreements
- D. Talking mostly about yourself
Why: Trust develops through repeated experiences of reliability. Following through on commitments, even small ones, signals that the other person can depend on you, which is essential for deepening a relationship.
Q4. What does research suggest about the role of close social connections in happiness?
- A. They have little effect compared to income
- B. They are one of the strongest predictors of life satisfaction ✓
- C. They only matter during childhood
- D. They reduce happiness by increasing obligations
Why: Long-running studies such as the Harvard Study of Adult Development have found that the quality of close relationships is among the strongest predictors of long-term happiness and health, often more so than wealth or fame.
Q5. Which approach is most effective when beginning to connect with someone new?
- A. Asking open-ended questions and listening actively ✓
- B. Answering every question with a single word
- C. Redirecting every conversation to your own achievements
- D. Waiting for the other person to make all the effort
Why: Open-ended questions invite meaningful sharing, and active listening shows genuine interest. Together they create the reciprocal exchange that allows connection to develop naturally.
Module 2
Module 2: Understanding Your Attachment Style
Understanding Your Attachment Style
Knowledge check
Q1. Which of the following best describes the core idea of attachment theory as it applies to adult relationships?
- A. Adult romantic bonds are shaped only by current personality traits and have no link to early experiences.
- B. Early bonds with caregivers shape expectations and behaviors in later close relationships. ✓
- C. Attachment patterns are fixed at birth and cannot change over a lifetime.
- D. Attachment only matters for children and has no relevance to adult partnerships.
Why: Attachment theory proposes that early relationships with caregivers form internal working models that influence how people approach intimacy, trust, and separation in adulthood. These patterns can shift with experience, so they are not fixed at birth.
Q2. A person who feels comfortable with closeness, trusts their partner, and is not overly worried about being abandoned most likely has which attachment style?
- A. Anxious
- B. Avoidant
- C. Secure ✓
- D. Disorganized
Why: Secure attachment is characterized by comfort with both intimacy and independence, along with trust that a partner will be available and responsive. Anxious attachment involves fear of abandonment, avoidant involves discomfort with closeness, and disorganized involves conflicting urges toward and away from intimacy.
Q3. Which behavior is most typical of an anxious attachment style in a romantic relationship?
- A. Preferring long stretches of time alone and downplaying the importance of partners
- B. Frequently seeking reassurance and feeling distressed when a partner takes time to respond ✓
- C. Feeling calm and steady even during conflict or periods of separation
- D. Shifting between craving closeness and pushing people away unpredictably
Why: Anxiously attached individuals often worry about whether their partner truly cares and may seek frequent reassurance, becoming distressed by perceived signs of distance such as slow replies. The other options describe avoidant, secure, and disorganized patterns respectively.
Q4. Why is self-reflection about your attachment style useful, even though it is not a fixed label?
- A. It proves that your partner is responsible for all relationship problems.
- B. It helps you recognize patterns in your reactions and communicate your needs more effectively. ✓
- C. It allows you to diagnose a mental disorder and choose a treatment plan on your own.
- D. It guarantees that you will always choose the right partner without further effort.
Why: Understanding your tendencies helps you notice when old patterns are triggered and express needs more clearly. It is a tool for growth and better communication, not a diagnosis or a guarantee of outcomes.
Q5. Which statement best reflects the research view that attachment styles can change over time?
- A. Attachment styles change only after a person reaches age 60.
- B. Attachment styles never change once formed in childhood.
- C. Supportive relationships, self-awareness, and therapy can gradually shift how a person attaches in adulthood. ✓
- D. Only a change in biological sex can alter an attachment style.
Why: Research suggests attachment is partly stable but also responsive to experience. Consistently supportive relationships, reflection, and therapeutic work can help people develop more secure patterns over time.
Module 3
Module 3: Effective Communication Skills
Effective Communication Skills
Knowledge check
Q1. Which of the following is an example of active listening?
- A. Planning your response while the other person is still speaking
- B. Summarizing what the other person said to confirm you understood it ✓
- C. Interrupting to share a similar experience of your own
- D. Checking your phone while the other person talks to show you are busy
Why: Summarizing or paraphrasing what someone said shows you are paying attention and gives them a chance to correct any misunderstanding. The other options are barriers to listening: rehearsing a reply, interrupting, and distraction all signal that the speaker is not being heard.
Q2. What is the main purpose of using 'I' statements, such as 'I feel worried when plans change suddenly'?
- A. To place blame on the other person for a problem
- B. To express your own feelings without making the other person defensive ✓
- C. To win an argument by stating your position as a fact
- D. To avoid discussing the issue altogether
Why: 'I' statements focus on your own experience rather than accusing the other person. Compare this with 'You always ruin our plans,' which tends to trigger defensiveness and escalate conflict.
Q3. Which nonverbal behavior generally signals openness and engagement during a conversation?
- A. Crossing your arms and avoiding eye contact
- B. Leaning slightly toward the speaker and nodding occasionally ✓
- C. Looking at the clock repeatedly
- D. Keeping your body turned away from the speaker
Why: Leaning in and nodding show attentiveness and encouragement. Crossed arms, averted gaze, checking the time, and turning away can all be read as disinterest or defensiveness.
Q4. During a disagreement, which approach is most likely to keep communication productive?
- A. Raising your voice so your point is heard
- B. Bringing up past mistakes to strengthen your argument
- C. Pausing to calm down and then returning to the topic when ready ✓
- D. Refusing to acknowledge any valid point the other person makes
Why: Taking a pause when emotions run high helps both people think more clearly and prevents hurtful statements. Bringing up past mistakes, shouting, and refusing to acknowledge valid points all tend to escalate conflict rather than resolve it.
Q5. What is the difference between asking open-ended and closed questions?
- A. Open-ended questions can be answered with yes or no, while closed questions invite detailed responses
- B. Open-ended questions invite detailed responses, while closed questions can usually be answered with a short answer ✓
- C. Open-ended questions are only useful in professional settings
- D. Closed questions always make conversations more interesting
Why: Open-ended questions such as 'What was your day like?' encourage elaboration and deeper conversation. Closed questions such as 'Did you have a good day?' usually get a brief yes or no and can limit the exchange.
Module 4
Module 4: Managing Conflict Constructively
Managing Conflict Constructively
Knowledge check
Q1. Which of the following is an example of using 'I' statements to address conflict constructively?
- A. You never listen to me and always ignore my opinions.
- B. I feel overlooked when my ideas aren't discussed in our meetings. ✓
- C. Everyone thinks you are being unreasonable about this.
- D. You always make everything about yourself, don't you?
Why: 'I' statements describe your own feelings and experiences without blaming the other person, which reduces defensiveness and keeps the focus on finding a solution.
Q2. What is the main purpose of active listening during a disagreement?
- A. To prepare your rebuttal while the other person speaks
- B. To fully understand the other person's perspective before responding ✓
- C. To win the argument by pointing out flaws in their reasoning
- D. To end the conversation as quickly as possible
Why: Active listening means focusing on understanding what the other person is saying and feeling, which builds trust and makes it easier to find common ground.
Q3. Which response is most likely to de-escalate a heated conversation?
- A. Raising your voice so you are heard clearly
- B. Taking a short break and agreeing to return to the topic later ✓
- C. Bringing up past mistakes the other person has made
- D. Refusing to discuss the issue until they apologize
Why: Taking a timeout when emotions run high allows both people to calm down, and returning later lets you discuss the issue more rationally.
Q4. What does it mean to focus on the problem rather than the person during conflict?
- A. Ignoring the other person's feelings to stay objective
- B. Addressing the specific issue at hand instead of attacking the other person's character ✓
- C. Deciding who is right and who is wrong before talking
- D. Avoiding any discussion of how the conflict affects you
Why: Separating the issue from the individual prevents personal attacks, helping both people work together toward a solution instead of defending themselves.
Q5. Which approach best describes a constructive goal for resolving a conflict?
- A. Making sure one person clearly wins the argument
- B. Finding a solution that addresses the core needs of both people ✓
- C. Avoiding the issue permanently so it never comes up again
- D. Getting the other person to admit they were entirely at fault
Why: Constructive conflict management aims for mutually acceptable outcomes that meet the needs of both parties, which strengthens the relationship over time.
Module 5
Module 5: Building Trust and Intimacy
Building Trust and Intimacy
Knowledge check
Q1. Which behavior most directly builds trust in a relationship over time?
- A. Keeping score of who apologizes first
- B. Consistently following through on what you say you will do
- C. Sharing every private thought as soon as it occurs to you
- D. Avoiding any disagreement to keep the peace
Q2. What is emotional intimacy?
- A. Living together and sharing finances
- B. A sense of closeness created by sharing feelings, vulnerabilities, and being understood
- C. Spending as much time as possible together
- D. Physical closeness without any emotional connection
Q3. Why is active listening important for building intimacy?
- A. It allows you to plan your response while the other person talks
- B. It shows the other person they are heard and valued, encouraging openness
- C. It helps you win arguments more easily
- D. It replaces the need for any verbal communication
Q4. What is the best way to repair trust after a small breach, such as forgetting an important commitment?
- A. Pretend it did not happen and hope it is forgotten
- B. Acknowledge the mistake, take responsibility, and show changed behavior over time
- C. Immediately bring up every past mistake to show you are sorry
- D. Ask the other person to fix the problem on their own
Q5. Which statement best describes vulnerability in a relationship?
- A. Showing weakness in order to gain control over the other person
- B. Willingly sharing honest feelings or needs, accepting the risk of not being met with acceptance
- C. Avoiding conflict so that no one can get hurt
- D. Relying entirely on your partner to make all decisions
Module 6
Module 6: Maintaining Friendships and Support Networks
Maintaining Friendships and Support Networks
Knowledge check
Q1. Which of the following is considered a key benefit of having a strong support network?
- A. It eliminates all life stress
- B. It provides emotional comfort and practical help during difficult times ✓
- C. It guarantees you will never disagree with anyone
- D. It means you need no other personal goals
Why: Strong support networks offer emotional comfort, advice, and practical help, which buffer against stress. They do not remove stress or conflict entirely.
Q2. What is one effective way to maintain a friendship over a long distance?
- A. Waiting until you see each other in person to communicate
- B. Scheduling regular video calls or messages ✓
- C. Only reaching out when you need something
- D. Avoiding conversations about personal topics
Why: Regular, planned contact such as video calls or messages keeps the connection active and shows ongoing care, even when you are far apart.
Q3. Which behavior most often helps a friendship grow stronger over time?
- A. Keeping score of favors given and received
- B. Being reliable and following through on commitments ✓
- C. Competing with your friend for attention
- D. Sharing only positive news
Why: Reliability builds trust, which is the foundation of lasting friendships. Keeping score or hiding difficulties tends to weaken closeness.
Q4. What does it mean to be a good listener in a supportive friendship?
- A. Waiting silently while planning your reply
- B. Giving full attention and trying to understand the other person's perspective ✓
- C. Changing the subject to your own experiences
- D. Offering solutions before the person finishes speaking
Why: Good listening involves full attention and empathy. Interrupting or quickly redirecting the conversation can make the other person feel unheard.
Q5. Why is it important to diversify your support network?
- A. So you have more people to avoid when you are busy
- B. So that different people can meet different needs and you are not overly dependent on one person ✓
- C. Because having only one close friend is always harmful
- D. So you can compare how much each friend cares about you
Why: A diverse network spreads emotional and practical support across several people, so no single relationship has to carry all of your needs, which also reduces strain on each friendship.
Module 7
Module 7: Sustaining Long-Term Happiness Together
Sustaining Long-Term Happiness Together
Knowledge check
Q1. According to research on long-term relationship satisfaction, which behavior is most strongly associated with couples maintaining happiness over time?
- A. Avoiding all disagreements to keep the peace
- B. Regularly turning toward each other's bids for attention and connection ✓
- C. Spending every free moment together
- D. Keeping finances completely separate
Why: Research by John Gottman found that couples who frequently turn toward each other's small bids for connection, rather than turning away, are far more likely to remain satisfied and stable over time.
Q2. What is the term for a deliberate, recurring practice that couples use to reconnect, reflect, and strengthen their bond?
- A. A relationship audit
- B. A couple's ritual ✓
- C. A conflict resolution contract
- D. A financial plan
Why: Couple's rituals, such as a weekly walk, a shared morning coffee, or a regular date night, create predictable moments of connection that help sustain closeness and shared meaning over the long term.
Q3. Which approach to conflict is most consistent with sustaining happiness in long-term relationships?
- A. Waiting until anger fades before discussing issues at all
- B. Focusing on solvable problems and addressing them with a gentle start-up ✓
- C. Winning every argument by presenting the strongest evidence
- D. Bringing up grievances from the past to show a pattern
Why: Couples who raise issues gently, without criticism or contempt, and work on solvable problems tend to maintain satisfaction. Harsh start-ups often predict negative outcomes, while softened ones support resolution.
Q4. What does it mean to practice gratitude within a long-term relationship?
- A. Expressing appreciation for your partner's specific actions and qualities regularly ✓
- B. Thanking your partner only on anniversaries and birthdays
- C. Avoiding complaints by pretending everything is fine
- D. Comparing your partner favorably to other people
Why: Regular, specific expressions of appreciation help partners feel seen and valued. Studies suggest gratitude strengthens commitment and buffers against the natural erosion of positive feelings over time.
Q5. Why do many couples experience a decline in relationship satisfaction over the early years, and what helps counter this?
- A. Because love is finite, so couples must accept decline as inevitable
- B. Because routines and familiarity can reduce novelty, so intentionally sharing new experiences helps renew connection ✓
- C. Because partners naturally become less attractive, so appearance must be maintained
- D. Because children always cause divorce, so couples should delay having them
Why: Familiarity can dampen excitement and closeness. Research on self-expansion suggests that pursuing new activities together, such as learning a skill or traveling, can reignite positive feelings and keep the relationship growing.